Effective coaching is not so much what you say but what you ask.  Asking your players powerful questions is much more productive than telling them what to do.  True coaching is about developing a strong relationship with your players for the purpose of THEIR growth and development.  It’s about helping your players fulfill their goals and commitments.  Applying effective communication skills in coaching helps you to develop a strong relationship with your players.

One of a crucial coaching skill is having open coaching conversations with your athletes. Coaching conversations are side-by-side interactions where both of you are looking at where the athlete is headed and discussing what is the next step they need to take to get them there.  Your job is to conduct dialogues of inquiry with your players where ultimately they discover the next action to take.

As a coach, you set the context for these dialogues.  Setting the stage for effective coaching conversations begins during the recruiting phase and is reinforced every time you address your team.  Your players need to know clearly who you are and what you are trying to accomplish in your program.  Players need to know from the outset of their relationship with you that their goals and dreams are in alignment with yours. Effective coaching dialogs help to facilitate strong team communication and it creates an open atmosphere in the team.

Once a “good fit” is established, then the dialogues of inquiry can take place.  To coach anyone effectively, you need to know what they are committed to in their life.  Once you know what they are up to, it’s time to ask questions that will reveal the proper path to getting them where they want to go!

You set up your team code, now what happens if somebody breaks it?

Simple.  Call it!  If you someone breaks the code, it up to someone on the team or the whole team to pull that person aside and say, “We agreed on X.  I’m calling you on it right now.  We are not going to do that here.”

The Code is useless unless folks are willing to “Call It”.

In a strong team culture, “stuff” gets handled informally – by the players.  It is not the coaches responsibility to “call it” on folks.  It is up to the players to call it.

How to Call It:

1. Pick the appropriate time and place to do it.  In private if possible.
2. If it’s difficult for you to do this, acknowledge your feelings about it.  Let them know you are uncomfortable.
3. Ask permission.  Is it ok to talk about it right now?  If they so no, honor it and ask them when would be a good time to talk.
4. Talk about and correct the behavior not the person.  Depersonalize it – talk about the behavior.  “This (x) is the behavior we agreed to…”
5. State specifically and succinctly what didn’t work – avoid the whole story!  Then offer a solution.  “We have an agreement to be on time.  You were 10 minutes late.  If you need some support or need to be reminded let me know and I will call you.”
6. Remind them of the benefits for them and the team when we follow the code.
7. Remind them of the line of the code.
8. Allow them to respond.  Listen.  Thank them for listening to you.

If and when you see them correct the behavior – acknowledge it.

Teach this process to your athletes.  The pay off is huge – fewer “problems” come your way!

I just got back from delivering 4 Positive Coaching Alliance workshops for the town of Sisters Oregon. The leaders are up to big things for a small town (pop . 1750). The goal is to a youth sports “council” comprised of members from community sport groups.

I met with coaches, community leaders, athletes and parents. On the way home, it hit me that an important piece in developing a culture or “the way we do things here”, is to create a written code. I’ve worked a bit with Blair Singer, author of The ABC’s of Building a Business Team That Wins: The Invisible Code of Honor That Takes Ordinary People and Turns Them Into a Championship Team.

A Code of Honor is a set of simple, powerful rules that govern the internal behaviors of any team, organization, family, individual and even a nation, Singer says. “These rules determine how individuals behave toward one another within the team. They are what people are willing to stand for, defend and be accountable for.”

Last fall I spent a weekend working with the Cal Women’s tennis team and incorporated Singer’s idea of a Code of Honor. Here’s what we did:

1. Worked as a team. Everyone had to participate and everyone had to agree on the point in the code.

2. First we looked for recurring behavioral patterns that posed a problem to the performance of the team i.e being late, blaming etc.

3. We then talked about the various incidents and how it impacted the team both positively and negatively. Players talk about how they felt.

4. Once we agreed upon one element of the code, we wrote it into a statement for example, “We keep all time agreements”.

5. We were careful not to “legislate mood” (especially important with women) by saying “Always be optimistic”. Instead we stated, “If you have something good to say, say it. If you have something negative to say, best to deal with it privately and not dump it on the group”.

6. We kept the list to maximum of ten items.

Here are a few other examples:
Pattern to Eliminate:  Pointing finger No blame and justification.

Code:  We all take Personal responsibility for our actions.

Pattern to Eliminate:  Arguments

Code:  Never leave an argument for tomorrow.

Pattern to Eliminate:Take things for granted

Code:  Celebrate all wins!

FYI – the team went on to the NCAA finals!

Good Luck!

Creating the right recruiting fit is a two-way street. Whether the recruiting road ends in a dream or a nightmare is the responsibility of the recruiter and the recruit! Preparation is key to a happy ending. It is imperative for the prospective student-athlete and the college coach to do their homework.

If you are the coach of a prospective student-athlete, help them get properly prepared for one of the most impactful decisions they will ever make – where to go to college. Have them start with what I call “The Grid”. The grid is a chart of all the things the athlete deems are important in their decision vs the schools they are considering. Sample criteria the athlete may consider include the following:

• School size
• School location: close to home, diving distance, flight time, urban, rural
• Academics: reputation, majors offered
• Population: diversity
• Coach: reputation, stability of staff, male or female, age, pro background
• Strength of team: national ranking, conference standing
• Strength of schedule
• Program reputation: competitive, fit/strong, nice, team oriented etc
• Potential for playing time
• Quality of facilities
• Level of athletics: division, conference, football team
• Financial

Once the selection criteria are determined, help the athlete put them in rank order. In building the grid, list the criteria in rank order from left to right across the top of the chart. Now begin to list the schools under consideration down the far left column. Finally rank each school from 1 to 5 on how they rate on each of the individual selection criteria.

Over time, the top choices will begin to reveal themselves. These are the schools the athlete will want to consider visiting – either officially or unofficially.

The “Grid” also applies to the college coach as well. The recruiter’s grid lists all the things they are looking for in a prospective student-athlete. Examples include:

• Academic ability
• Athletic ability
• Playing time potential
• Role on the team
• Coachability
• Team player
• Leadership
• Mental Toughness

At Cal, we would list all the players we were interested in along the left hand side of the sheet and rank them on a 1-5 scale on each of our selection criteria. This process helped us determine who we wanted to bring in on an official visit.

Stay ‘Tooned’ the next entry will look at part two of preparation for the recruiting process – the interview questions.

To perform at our best, we need to maintain our personal integrity and manage our daily commitments. We all have our informal list of things we said we’d do yet haven’t quite gotten around to. When these commitments are broken, they drain our energy and distract our focus and purpose.

Summer is a great time to take personal stock. What’s incomplete in your life? What are all the things you said you’d do but have not done yet? This subconscious list is silently zapping your energy. Incompletions weigh on you whether you are aware of them or not.

Time to shed some light on the load you’re carrying around. Here’s a game plan to restore some of your energy and vitality:

1. List all the things you said you’d do yet have not done. Common examples include:

· Phone calls or emails you need to return

· Conversations you need to have

· Cleaning projects (yard, garage, basement etc)

· Finances

· Unfinished projects at home or work

· Things to research or file

2. Give each item a “by when” date. This is the date you will complete the item.

3. Note any requests you need to make in order to complete an item.

4. Go to work on your list.

Watch what happens as you complete the items on your list. You will begin to experience more energy and feel a bit lighter. What are you waiting for – lighten your load!